I was single for over two years and it was the best thing that could of happened to me. I realized that I had to learn from my past and love myself first before I could love anyone else.
Jump into a relationship, move in together, get engaged, be married, have kids and live happily ever after. What you’re not told is how much “hard work” it takes to be satisfied with another person for the rest of your life. In between the initial commitment and being happily married is a whole bunch of crap in between.
You set a certain criteria in your mind and once you meet that person, you fall in love. The criteria could be based on your past, your goals, the connection with your parents or events that have transpired in your life. Your plan is set and you settle down for what you think you want instead of knowing what you want. And it’s hard to know if you don’t self-examine, plan accordingly, accept reality and take the time to discover you.
There are many factors that need to happen to make a relationship work. You have to effectively communicate, make sacrifices and compromises, fight fair, avoid boredom, maintain the spark and keep each other first when life gets complicated. And this is just a few of the things. You also have to understand that points of views and perspectives about life change over time, so you must be open and not take for granted how the other person thinks and feels.
You allow family and society to lay out the roadmap for your personal life. They tell you what you should do, when you should do it and how it’s done. But you’ve never been taught how to do things for you and learn what you require to be happy. Once you know, you will only do things and include people in your life that contribute to your happiness.
During the time I was single, I learned who I was in a relationship without the noise and distractions of being in one. I learned my breaking points, identified typical red flags and vowed to take action if I noticed them again. The type of person I feel most comfortable with became apparent, and I realized I enjoyed having a partner more than being single. But it had to be the right partner.
It’s so easy for busy people to get lost in the day, especially being in a relationship. It’s important to focus on your goals, your behavior, and your general state of mind. This is why self-reflection is so crucial. It taught me to love myself and realize that if I never met the person I desired, I could be happy single.
Here are my 10 reasons why it’s okay being single.
1. You can date anyone
You are free to date as you please, so go get the number of that good looking stranger.
It’s all about you so you can do what you want without seeking permission.
3. The best is yet to come
Everything happens as it should so love yourself and the right person will come naturally.
4. You didn’t settle
It’s so many unhappy marriages and you’re fortunate not to be stuck in one of them.
5. There is still time to work on yourself
Hang out, meet new people, and learn exactly who you are and what you are looking for.
Go someplace you’ve never been and you will be amazed how many people are just like you when you travel the world.
7. You don’t have to share
Enjoy being a little selfish with your own needs, take care of yourself first and you will do more good to the world around you.
8. You avoid the trap
You avoid feeling trapped in a negative relationship and unable to get out.
9. Discover your passion
You do what you want, whenever you want – and once you figure out what you enjoy the most, it’s a stronger possibility of finding someone who shares similar interests.
10. You avoid divorce
Getting into a marriage is simple, getting out is a disaster.